stupid computer...

Ok, my computer is being really retarded and won't let me on AS. I know it's my comp because I can get on on my sisters computer. Anyway, I figured I'd let you know what was going on and why I haven't been on the board in a while. *beats up comp* Hopefully I'll be back soon but until my comp behaves itself I'll have to live w/out AS. :-( Anyways, I'll TTYL!!!

Racing Thoughts associated with bipolar disorder

I was doing some research today on something called 'Racing Thoughts' also known as 'Crowded Mind'. This is something I have seriously been affected by for a very long time. What I learned was that this may be a symptom of bipolar disorder. Which is something else I might be suffering from however I have not been diagnosed for bipolar so I cannot clearly say that I have it. I maintain my healing quite frequently. But I do have sudden outbursts if I forget to take my daily lexapro. I have more anger oubursts than I do depression outbursts so until I see a doctor to help me analyse what it is I may be suffering from I cannot tell for certain. However I thought it was crucial that I post the information that I found for those who may be disgnosed with bipolar disorder as knowledge is power. The information below is only a definition. Sometimes understanding what is going on inside of our minds is the best way to get help afterwards.

Love, Haullie

"Before I knew anything about bipolar disorder - much less than I myself had it - I called this sensation "racy brain." Thoughts and music would be zooming through my head so fast that sometimes I wanted to scream. If it was going on at bedtime, it could take me an hour or more of concentrating on word games to get myself to sleep.

Racing thoughts are not just "thinking fast." They are thoughts that just won't be quiet; they can be in the background of other thoughts or take over your consciousness; they can gallop around in the sufferer's head like a carousel gone out of control.

Components of racing thoughts can include music, snatches of conversation from movies or television or books, one's own voice or other voices repeating a phrase or sentences again and again, or even rhythms of pressure without any "sound" in the thought.

Racing thoughts is distinct from "hearing voices," which is a symptom of schizophrenia, severe mania or schizoaffective disorder.

Racing thoughts can be a symptom of mania, a mixed episode, depression or an anxiety disorder. Sometimes it is accompanied by a pounding heart or pounding pulses, including drumming in the ears. "

~ Marcia Purse


The board seems to be down. I contacted our host and asked her to take a look.

Last time it happened, the problem "fixed itself" after a while, hopefully this time too.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Operation Freefall 2006


I'm taking part in the Operation Freefall 2006 to raise money for SOAR
& RAINN and would really welcome your support.

Please take a moment to sponsor me. It's really easy - you can donate
online by credit card and receive a record of your donation. Here's
my page:

All donations are secure and sent directly to SOAR & RAINN. Please
join me in supporting SOAR & RAINN and a fabulous cause!

Thanks and best wishes,


Want to give up.

I am having a very hard time dealing with what my ex did to me. I just don't think I deserve to have another man in my life. He will eventually want the one thing I can't give him and because of this he will find somebody else who will give him what he wants. What is the point of fighting when sex is all men care about? I'm just a piece of ass to men and that is all I will ever be.


A messageboard of Musings

I don't know if this is appropriate to post here, please correct me or delete it if it is not. I've made a messageboard and it's geared towards absolutely anything. We have boards for music, books, and movies. We also have boards for relationships, sex, and sexuality. We have places for survivors to come and chat, and we have places to rant about good days and bad days. It's also a safe haven to discuss things like eating disorders, self injury, and substance abuse.

So we have a little bit of everything for just about everyone.
If you're interested, join today!
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